Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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