I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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