apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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