I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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