If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I wish i was in the wii world.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
