With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
