she smelled like a LAN party
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
