Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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