no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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