I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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