We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
