In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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