We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
