Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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