Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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