Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize