i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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