with your own penis?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
