i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
