So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize