whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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