feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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