the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
time to smoke my breakfast
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
