he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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