I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize