He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It's blow job season.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
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