Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
