Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
