i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Randomize