I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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