Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
