Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
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Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
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time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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