I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
