is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
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