I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
