I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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