Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you traded sex for a burrito?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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