I think my vagina is haunted
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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