my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Banned from zoo.
Again?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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