If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
