Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
And then my night got REAL pukey
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize