1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think my vagina is haunted
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Can I color on your dick again?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
