shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize