she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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