Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
