The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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