I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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