I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
