Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize