how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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