I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
