Non-Jews are for practice
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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