ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
