Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize